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boy sitting on ball

What Am I Teaching My Son If I Let Him Quit Playing Sports Just Because He’s Afraid of the Ball?

  You are teaching him… that you respect him, even if you don’t understand his choices. that you will listen closely to what he says and take it at face value. that it pays to speak up. that he doesn’t have to disguise his real feelings in order to gain or sustain your approval. that […]

Don’t Do A Victory Dance When Your Kid Says You Were Right

  Heidi was a 15 year old girl who came for therapy at the behest of her parents. “She’s been furious with us ever since we had her transfer to a charter school,” her mother told me over the phone when setting up her first appointment. “Her father and I were convinced she’d do better […]

Raising Boys to Be Good Sports:  Family Game Night and the Art of Interruption

This is the last in a series of six articles about raising boys to be good sports. I wouldn’t consider this series on good sportsmanship to be complete without saying at least a few words about family game nights—those hotbeds of rivalry disguised as interludes of filial togetherness. The problem of course isn’t in being competitive; […]

Fail Is Not a Four-Letter Word

How misguided compassion can end up being a child’s worst enemy in terms of healthy social and emotional development Nine-year-old Billy had been a brash schoolyard basketball player when I first met him. Now, a year later, he sat in my office sad and forlorn, next to his worried dad. “He won’t play basketball or […]

Mentoring Boys – The Challenge of Improving Communication Skills — Guest Post, Dr. Dennis Coates

For the next several months a group of writers focused on the issues of raising boys to become men are collaborating through the writing and sharing of blog posts in order to bring greater awareness to the unique challenges parents and the community face in the 21st Century. Twice a month these writers will be […]

It’s Never OK to Say Gay When You Really Mean Stupid, Guest Post by Rosalind Wiseman

For the next several months a group of writers focused on the issues of raising boys to become men are collaborating through the writing and sharing of blog posts in order to bring greater awareness to the unique challenges parents and the community face in the 21st Century.  Twice a month these writers will be […]

“Like Pulling Teeth…” Getting Your Teen to Talk

monosyllabia – a reactive disorder of adolescence characterized by the tendency to speak only in one syllable words   Just kidding. I made up that thing about monosyllabia.  But the following story is true. Fifteen year old Katie walked in the front door of her home and dropped her book bag on the ground.  She […]