In the agonizing moments before their names are called, those last boys picked for the kickball or basketball team during gym, or its un-legislated twin—recess—are getting a tutorial in what it means to be considered a liability. Alternating turns, the team captains—boys chosen for their athletic prowess or popularity or both—pick from among the rest […]
For too long this familiar adage — “boys will be boys” — has served as nothing more than a thin disguise for poor behavior that boys and men should have long outgrown or never developed in the first place. Countless acts of cruelty, bullying, teasing, assault, harassment, and exploitation have been normalized as de facto […]
Our discussions with kids about bullying typically cover such topics as what they can do, who they should tell, or why kids bully in the first place. But where does that leave the kid who feels the only way to keep himself safe is to bully other kids? Does he have anyone telling him that […]
It’s a simple phrase meant to dismiss bad boy behavior as simply boy behavior. Because of it, countless boys have been left to suffer at the hands of other boys, the latter group empowered by the implicit sanctioning of their brutality. Sure, girls and boys are different. Most girls will never take to blowing snot […]
Men and boys run a pretty tight club, one beauty of it being that all of their rules and codes of conduct are handed down without benefit of contracts or bylaws or training manuals or even note cards. Most guys probably couldn’t even tell you where or when all that handing down takes place. It […]
Here are some of the things you’ll hear or see from boys who become anxious when they think they might have to get involved in some game, or get stuck being the only one sitting it out. They may complain of bellyaches, headaches, or general “I don’t feel well” on gym days. They might hang […]
Despite our communal anxiety about keeping adolescents in check, our culture still seems to like its teenagers a little coltish and unruly. You see this in parents’ bemused tolerance for their kids’ antics, and in the charity afforded them when rude or irresponsible; “typical teenage behavior” it’s called, which is unfortunate. Teenagers can do better, […]
Sure, the kid is tough and “can take it.” But should he have to? “He’s tough, he’s a boy. He can take it,” says a father about his six-year-old son, who just got knocked flat on his face by an older brother testing out his brand-new bike. Sure he can take it. What choice does he have? […]
This is the last in a series of six articles about raising boys to be good sports. I wouldn’t consider this series on good sportsmanship to be complete without saying at least a few words about family game nights—those hotbeds of rivalry disguised as interludes of filial togetherness. The problem of course isn’t in being competitive; […]
For the last several months a group of writers has been focusing on the issues of boys and men by collaborating through the writing and sharing of blog posts in order to bring greater awareness to the unique challenges boys and men face in the 21st Century. Twice a month these writers are posting the […]
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